2012: The Reading Year in Completely Fake Statistics

It's become a tradition at Ready When You Are, C.B. to celebrate the passing of another year with a set of completely fake statistics about that year's reading.  (See previous list for 2011 here and 2010 here.)  In no way do I mean to make fun of people who compile year end stats about the books they have read.  I admire you all.  I really do. I wish I could keep records like you.  So does my bank.   But I offer up this years completely fake reading stats for your amusment all the same.

While some of the items featured this year may be controversial in nature, please keep in mind that all statistics quoted below are 100% falsified much like the majority of this year's presidential polling.  

To start off, I read another 87 books this year.  Each year I read 87 books because that is  the number of times the glyph for Xstaylan, the Mayan god of letters, appears in the famed Baltimore Codex.

The 87 books I read this year break down as follows:

New books - 7
Second hand books - 32
Library books - 18
Advanced Reader Copies - 3
Stolen books - 1

Bought this year - 48
Bought last year - 25
Bought less than 5 years ago - 32
Bought more than 5 years ago - 23
Owned since high school and never read before - 8

Read at Starbucks - 14
Read at coffee shops other than Starbucks - 9
Read at In-n-Out Burgers -  5
Read at Denny's - 3
Read at Chick-fil-A - 0

Read while sitting up - 74
Read while lying down - 15
Read while pacing about nervously - 1
Read while eating - 14
Read while....well.....you know - 3

Pop-up books - 0
Traditional flat books - 87

Read prior to the Mayan apocolypse 85
Read after the Mayan apocolypse 2, maybe 3

Read during Republican presidential primary debates 23
Read during presidential debates 2

Most annoying word in the books I read this year - meta-cognitive
Second most annoying word in the books I read this year - erstwhile

Books featuring the word 'grey' in the title - 0
Books read featuring other color related words in the title. 3
Books with no color mentioned in the title 84

Books read instead of finally completing Haruki Murakami's massive novel 1Q84 which I've owned since the day it came out in America- 87

Books that failed to address issues of importance to contemporary readers - 65
Books that took a stand on issues of importance to contemporary readers - 21
Books that exploited issues of importance to contemporary readers but failed to state an opinion on them while simultaneously proclaiming that a position of neutrality was morally superior to taking a stand one way or another even on issues like the effectivenes of torture - 2

Read before going on a diet and losing 50 pounds - 38
Read after going on a diet and losing 50 pounds - 38
Read after going off the diet and gaining ten pounds back - 6

Books that are suitable for children - 46
Books that are unsuitable for children - 31
Books that might be suitable for particularly precocious children - 16

Most frequently used letter in the books read this year - e.  Again.

Books featuring normal sized print - 86
Books featuring large type print - 1

Authors who made no financial contributions to political candidates this year - 38
Authors who made financial contributions under one hundred dollars - 24
Authors who made financial contributiosn over one hundred dollars - 12
Authors who have their own super-pac - 3
Authors who were political candidates - 0

Titles that reference classical literature or poetry - 8
Titles that reference popular music or song lyrics - 7
Titles that reference murder or other crimes - 19
Titles that reference commercial products - 5
Titles that reference desirable vacation destinations - 6
Titles that reference cooking or baked goods - 4
Titles that reference historical events - 3
Titles that reference dogs - 2

Books read while it was raining - 5
Books read while it was cold and foggy outside - 14
Books read while the sun was shining - 32
Books read at night - 41

Some thoughts on my reading this year.

Reading books by people your own age gets harder every year. Unless I give in and just embrace memoirs, I'm less and less likely to find books by people my age or older, especially now that Phillip Roth has retired.  But then, even memoirs tend to skew young these days.  For example:

"The day I was born, March 1, 1994, Celine Dion was solid at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 with "The Power of Love." Not a bad song to start your life on." -page 26 of Justin Bieber: The Billboard Cover Story.

(Okay, Bieber.  We get it.  Celine Dion is old enough to be your mother.  Rub it in!)

While I admit to following politics the way most men follow football, I was not as interested in the presidential campaign this year as I was last time around, which explains why I got so much reading done during the various debates.  I got much more done during the Republican primary debates because there were more of them and because I didn't actually watch any.

Most of the authors I read are lesser known so they don't earn enough money to give large donations to political candidates, with few exceptions.  Apparently Gillian Flynn, author of Gone Girl, gave lots of money to either Mitt Romney or Barak Obama-- she keeps saying it's one then, just when you start to believe her, she says no, it was the other.  Yann Martel has similar issues.

I read much more when the sun is shining because I live in California.  I read a lot when it's cold and foggy because I live in Northern Calirfornia.  I should note that the books I read when I should have been walking Dakota were all read on sunny days.  Dakota does not like to go out the rain.

While I did not read any books in a Chick-fil-a restaurant this year, this should not be seen as a political statement.  Like most of California, Vallejo, where I live, is still a Chick-fil-a free zone.  The books I read while eating were read both before and during the diet as well as after it.  However the books I read while on the diet were all quite short.  Thank God for The Art of the Novella series and for Lean Cuisine.  

A good read leaves you hungry for more.